rrrowr: by babyoil_gfx  (Default)
[personal profile] rrrowr
Title: The Cure for What Ails You
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Dalton, Kurt’s transfer
Summary/Prompt: Kurt’s had hiccups for a while now and nothing seems to help stop them. Luckily, it seems that Blaine has read up on an unusual line of research that might be exactly the thing that Kurt needs right now.
Author notes: First, there really are studies on for rectal massages as a treatment for hiccups. Second, any excuse is a good excuse so whatevs. Third, this is also for [livejournal.com profile] pyroclastic since she posted a similar prompt on the regular prompt meme and also did the beta for this.

"Nothing's working," Kurt groaned, flopping dramatically onto his bed while little hiccups worked their way into his throat. "I have -hic- to practice my solo and at this rate -hic- that's never going to happen and the Warblers are all going to think I'm a let down and -hic I'm gonna get kicked out and then my life will be a failure because I can't even stay -hic- in an a cappella group that only does the two-step shuffle."

Rifling through some papers at his desk, Blaine made a small noise of interest while his printer coughed out still more sheets that were apparently very interesting.

Hiccuping rather pathetically into his pillow, Kurt peeked up at Blaine, who was reading with an intense crease between his brows. "You're -hic- gonna get wrinkles like that." A shame, too, Kurt thought, since Blaine looked very attractive when he was focused. "I don't suppose that you're looki-hic-ng up some kind of obscure cure for hiccups?"

Eyebrows climbing up to extraordinary levels, Blaine said, "Actually-" and tilted his slender stack of papers toward Kurt so that he could see the title of the article he was reading.

The title was in all bold, intimidating and undeniable: Termination of intractable hiccups with digital rectal massage.

"You must be joking," Kurt said, sitting up and snatching the papers from the other boy's hands, but of course, the article was genuine, if kind of ridiculous. His body jumped a little as he stifled another hiccup. "How does it even work?"

"Something about an abundance of sympathetic and parasympathetic nerves-" Blaine coughed uncomfortably as he followed some text that was later in the article with his thumb. "-in the area. It says that theoretically, the massage would lead to increased vagal tone -- whatever that means -- and potential termination of hiccups."

Kurt tried really hard not to consider it -- like, amazingly so considering that his hiccups had been around for the past day and a half, relentless even in the face of traditional cures like holding his breath and being scared witless between classes. He should get an award for how much he was trying not to think about it, especially when Blaine was making it couldn't hurt to try expressions, but of course, it was obvious how much he was completely and totally failing in that regard because he could feel the heat of his blush leeching through his skin.

Christ, he hadn't even so much as confessed yet and was he really going to let Blaine--

Yes. Yes absolutely he was going to let Blaine do whatever he wanted.

Choking on another hiccup, Kurt blurted out, "Sure. Okay." Then, when Blaine's face had turned toward him, clearly surprised but not (thankfully) opposed in any way, went on with, "I mean, it's... It's -hic- It's worth a shot, right?"

Blaine swallowed and then did something needlessly sexy by licking his lips. "Now?"

Unable to say that he hadn't really thought that far in advance -- nothing beyond oh god, yes please -- Kurt just rolled his shoulders in a half shrug and shifted over to make room on the bed for Blaine.

It took a little bit for Blaine to start moving, not that Kurt was in any rush for this to happen any time soon as nervous as he was, but once he was up, he started rummaging around in his bedside drawers. He set up top the things he found that Kurt silently agreed might come in handy: lube and finger cots.

While Blaine gestured vaguely at the finger cots, Kurt was surprised to see a blush creeping around his neck. "A joke from the boys," he explained, "but they've um... They've come in handy. So to speak."

"So I guess you know what you're doing, then," Kurt hiccupped.

"Yeah," Blaine sighed rather fondly before seeming to backtrack rather hurriedly. "I mean! Well, yes but not with other people." He scrubbed his palms down the sides of his pants as he looked down at where Kurt was lying on the bed. His eyes were wild around the edges. "Not that I'm an expert or anything, but-"

"Blaine," Kurt cut in and apparently succeeded in sounding more confident than he felt when he said, "I'll just trust you, okay?" because Blaine sagged in relief and nodded.

After some quiet, stilted discussion, they agreed that Kurt would take off all his clothes except for a t-shirt. For modesty's sake, he'd have a towel over his lower regions until the actual massage and he'd be lying face down. Despite Blaine insistence, it would really, really not be required for him to also take off his clothes in order to make Kurt feel more comfortable, but he did end up changing into his sleepwear -- soft, cotton shorts and a fitted tee -- so that whatever mess they made with the lube wouldn't end up on his uniform. It was kind of nice, having talked about it, Kurt thought. His nerves were calmer than he thought they would be, lying down on the bed and waiting for Blaine to join him. Earlier, he thought he'd have been shaking, but he only jumped, slightly skittish, when Blaine's hand landed on his shoulder.

"Buck over a bit," Blaine told him and when Kurt did so, he immediately took up the free space.

Blaine wasn't really a big guy -- nothing compared to Finn or Puck or even Kurt himself sometimes -- but when he was taking up one whole side of the bed, blocking escape from one side while the wall caged Kurt in on the other, he suddenly felt larger than life. It probably couldn’t be helped that Kurt started breathing unsteadily, even though he knew that Blaine was one of the good guys and that he liked Blaine an awful lot (that he loved him, even).

Then Blaine’s hand was on his shoulder again, with its heavy weight and large size mostly a reassuring illusion. He said, “relax,” and he said, “I’ve got you,” while Kurt continued to hiccup uncertainly. “We’ll have those hiccups gone in no time at all.”

It took a while but eventually Kurt’s breathing was more even -- hiccups aside -- and he could enjoy that Blaine’s hands were on him. Blaine was petting him, really, in firm sweeps of his palm that were made awkward only by the bunching of Kurt’s t-shirt underneath. Blaine passed his hand over Kurt’s body from the base of his neck, down his spine, to the edge of the towel near his tailbone. It was relaxing and comforting and kind of ridiculously arousing.

“Blaine,” Kurt sighed, intending on sounding impatient but his voice just melted out of him, warm as spun sugar.

Kurt’s shirt was rucked up a little on the next slide of Blaine’s hand, and Kurt didn’t even mind that, instead of starting back up the top of his spine, Blaine’s knuckles smoothed over the shallow dip in his back, rubbing in steady circles until Kurt thought he might just sink into the mattress. It was easy from there to expand his awareness from Blaine’s hands to all of him – to the way their bare legs were next to each other to how Blaine was holding his weight on one elbow. He especially noticed how the shoulder of the same arm was leaning into his space, not quite touching, while Blaine leaned in and whispered the most unintentionally hot question right against the shell of Kurt’s ear.


When Kurt nodded, Blaine twisted around and there was some shuffling -- wrappers being discarded, finger cots being put on. Only a few short moments had passed, but by then, some of the looseness in Kurt’s body had leeched out of him. He was very quickly realizing that the boy he liked -- loved -- was about to see him and touch him. As soon as that towel was gone, Blaine would see that Kurt was hard from just being touched like this -- with care and gentleness and-

“Don’t worry,” whispered Blaine as he scooted down the bed.

His hand, the one with finger cots on two fingers, came to rest on Kurt’s thigh. The feel of dry latex tugged at Kurt’s skin and if Blaine heard him whimper, he didn’t say anything. His lips were too busy meeting the bumps of Kurt’s spine, after all.

“Have you done this before?” Blaine asked. His breath was a warm gust against Kurt’s back. When Kurt nodded his head -- because yes, he had, but not like this, not with anyone else, and certainly not with someone who meant as much to him as Blaine was beginning to -- Blaine laughed a little and said, “I’ll be gentle anyway.”

Kurt nodded and then hiccupped abruptly when Blaine leaned into him fully from shoulder to ankle before sliding the towel down. Blaine’s shoulder was pressed into the side of his ribs and Kurt could feel the weight of him as he leaned over to pat at Kurt’s thigh, encouraging him without words to bring it up to his side. The action didn’t change much but Kurt felt as if he’d exposed himself a great deal, despite how Blaine’s clothes against his body made him feel less bare.

The first touch of lube was cold and the angle of Blaine’s fingers awkward until Kurt turned onto his side a little. Blaine’s thanks was just a huff of air over Kurt’s shoulder blade, but Kurt didn’t notice. He had Blaine’s fingers moving against his opening in slow, barely-there circles, waiting for the lube to warm and Kurt’s tension to leave.

“You’re doing so good,” Blaine murmured, absently, as if he didn’t even realize he was speaking, but that was just ludicrous because Blaine nosed up close to Kurt’s neck and said, “I’m going in, okay?”

Kurt wanted to groan, “Don’t tell me,” at Blaine but by the time the complaint was on his tongue, one finger was already sliding inside him, slick with a great deal of lube, twisting around to spread it before sliding back out to gather more. Instead he buried his face into the pillow and hissed, “Shit, Blaine-

“Stop?” Blaine asked, though his hand didn’t so much as pause as it just pressed more lube inside Kurt.

“No,” Kurt groaned, lifting his bent leg higher, opening himself that much more for Blaine’s ministrations.

Embarrassment burned hot through Kurt’s blood, but he couldn’t bring himself to care when Blaine’s finger was squirming inside his body, bigger than Kurt thought it ought to feel. It felt weird and good, and it made his blood pound in his head. It made him want to shift, but every movement he wanted would be toward the intruding finger and that meant against Blaine’s body. So Kurt just held himself as still as he could, curling his hands into fists around the bed sheets when he just had to do something before he started making noises that would really make him embarrassed.

Blaine’s breathing was harsh behind his ear, sounding as rough as Kurt’s own breathing felt. Kurt couldn’t stop himself from hoping that Blaine was as affected by this situation as he was. He hoped that, if he did ever break and close the minute distance that separated them, he would feel the hard curve of an erection against his body. Nothing would bring that moment, of course, Kurt told himself fiercely, reigning in what were becoming his desperate responses to the feel of Blaine’s finger moving inside him in gentle thrusts.

He forgot, however, that Blaine was the kind of guy that liked to meet expectations then prove himself beyond them. The situation had started out as just a test -- an exploration of a purported remedy -- but so help him, Blaine was going to make sure that Kurt’s body could never think of hiccups ever again.

Kurt’s warning was just this: “Just a little more.”

Then Blaine’s second finger was spreading Kurt open and sliding inside him and rubbing persistently across the place inside him that sent a blaze of white-hot want through him. Kurt jerked, without meaning to, toward the curve of Blaine’s fingers and unleashed the throaty groan that had been building up inside him for so long now.

He’d felt it.

“Oh god,” he whimpered, squeezing his eyes shut as he shifted again, rubbing back up against the hard length he’d encountered. “Blaine.”

“I’m sorry,” hissed Blaine, though his apologies didn’t stop him from curling his fingers more firmly into Kurt’s body. It didn’t stop him from making him shudder and shudder until Kurt was shoving away the towel and taking himself in hand. “Jesus,” Blaine cursed and Kurt knew -- he knew -- that he was watching Kurt touch himself. “Kurt, I just wanted-“

“It’s okay,” Kurt reassured him, though he could barely think when Blaine moved so deeply that it felt like his knuckles were starting to press in as well. God, he was just spread so wide. “Just a little more, I-“

Turning Kurt to lie on his back, Blaine said, “I’ve got you,” and made a soothing noise when Kurt voiced his complaint at Blaine slipping from his hole. “Just let me-“

Blaine slid down, knees tucking under him as he brought one of Kurt’s legs over his shoulders and pushed the other to the side. There was a smear of lube across Kurt’s thigh now, but Kurt just swiped at it halfheartedly. When Blaine’s fingers were inside him again, it felt like they went deeper than ever with every shallow thrust. Kurt bucked, whining high in the back of his throat, and then Blaine was leaning down.

That was Blaine’s tongue laving over Kurt’s hip bone and that was Blaine’s jaw that Kurt felt against his knuckles as he pulled as his cock. Just looking down at him, at the dark loops of hair hanging down to tease over Kurt’s skin, was surreal and intense and more than he could have imagined and hoped for. Whispering things that Kurt had never thought he would hear -- so beautiful, so wonderful, god, I love you -- Blaine twisted his fingers inside Kurt, a smooth and unexpected motion that had Kurt squeezing his cock and coming in streaks over his own chest.

Sagging down into the bed, Kurt laughed – grunting only a little when Blaine’s fingers slipped free. There was a fond, exasperated moment between them, both of them blushing and self-conscious about what had just happened.

Kurt’s eyes dropped to the wet stain on Blaine’s shorts. “I don’t suppose-,” he started.

“I’m good,” Blaine said breathlessly, shifting uncomfortably as he sat back on his heels and let Kurt’s leg fall from his shoulder to his hip. He scratched at the back of his hand and pulled off the little latex condoms from his fingers. “You?” Caught off guard, Kurt’s laughter turned suddenly quizzical. “Your hiccups,” Blaine clarified.

They sat there, listening to Kurt’s breathing for a moment, but no hiccups came.

“Gone, apparently,” Kurt said, quietly. He wondered if maybe all those things he’d heard whispered against his skin were just from his (ever hopeful, overactive) imagination. “Hell of a cure.”

“Yeah,” Blaine agreed, still a brilliant red. “Highly effective.”

Still, Kurt thought as he pushed himself up on his elbows. “Maybe,” he said and oh-

That would be Blaine looking up at Kurt through his lashes with his big, hopeful puppy-dog eyes. Kurt found Blaine’s foot with his toes and slid them alongside each other. It was a bold move, but it was hard to be shy when his cock was just lying out there in the open.

“Maybe we should do a repeat application,” Kurt suggested and pushed himself onto his hands so that he was near eye-level with Blaine. “Just to be sure.”
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Date: 2011-01-01 04:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slayerkitty.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-01 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Science is pretty much the best ever. I would put some serious funding into this research. Forever.

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From: [identity profile] laviegirlie.livejournal.com - Date: 2011-01-01 04:31 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2011-01-01 04:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lextempus.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-03 02:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
I thought so too! ♥

Date: 2011-01-01 04:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cetra.livejournal.com
adfkajdfs this was really hot
although at first i couldn't stop thinking about this episode of QI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JbdTRpeHNI) lol.

awesome fic! blaine, you're so thoughtful. ♥

Date: 2011-01-01 03:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pyroclastic.livejournal.com

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Date: 2011-01-01 04:31 am (UTC)
ext_25166: (pic#)
From: [identity profile] abluegirl.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-03 02:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
LOL Oh, don't be embarrassed by it, bb~ We're all friends here! :D

Date: 2011-01-01 04:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] niniblack.livejournal.com
The ~science makes it even hotter. ♥

Date: 2011-01-03 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-01 04:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hoshi1989.livejournal.com
so hot!


Date: 2011-01-03 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
I'm glad you liked it!

Date: 2011-01-01 05:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firelle.livejournal.com
you killed me. omg, it's... i even... don't. i mean. SO HOT.


best way to start new year.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Hiccups? Medical cures? Porning up legitimate scientific discoveries?

2011 is looking to be bloody fantastic. ♥

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] firelle.livejournal.com - Date: 2011-01-03 10:44 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2011-01-01 05:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shia-labeouf.livejournal.com
Everything you write is so wonderful. Your pacing, your tone, the great care you always take with the two of them. Just gorgeous.

And now that that's out of the way, HOLY FUCK THIS WAS HOT. JUST. YEAH. UH-HUH.

(Incidentally, holding a spoonful of sugar in the mouth has never failed to cure my hiccups. Were I a boy, though, I'd forgo that remedy for this one every time.)

Date: 2011-01-03 02:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Awww, I'm so glad that you like my writing style! It's always nice to know that my abilities are appreciated, so thanks for letting me know! :D

(No kidding? I really think it must be this whole thing of tickling the parasympathetic system's nerve endings, so to speak. Holding the spoon in your mouth might be enough to trigger the gag reflex just enough to overcome any hiccups. This whole thing with the rectal massage was only used as a final attempt to cure according to the articles and even then the hiccups had been going on for days.)

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Date: 2011-01-01 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fabfemmeboy.livejournal.com
This was awesome. And hot - even the parts that weren't meant to be especially steamy were.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
\o/ Hoorah~ Thank you!

Date: 2011-01-01 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deathgetsusall.livejournal.com


Date: 2011-01-03 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-01 05:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] halona.livejournal.com
Thank you so much for writing this. It's exactly what I've been hoping for since I fist saw that article. So hot and adorable at the same time.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Haha, I'm definitely glad that I met your expectations then! :D

Date: 2011-01-01 05:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dusmarais.livejournal.com
You killed me with that last line there.

Two-step shuffle. Repeat Application.


Date: 2011-01-03 02:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Hee~ Boys will say anything, won't they? :D

♥ Thanks so much for responding!

Date: 2011-01-01 05:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nothingtoprovex.livejournal.com
oh god so fucking hot.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
I'm glad you liked this!

Date: 2011-01-01 06:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maplelump.livejournal.com
Can this be canon? Pretty please with a nude Blaine on top?

Date: 2011-01-03 02:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Unf, nude Blaine. *cough*Gorgeous image.*cough*

Date: 2011-01-01 06:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pushplaytobegin.livejournal.com
This was just what I needed! Hot, hilarious, sweet.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Thank you for your comment!

Date: 2011-01-01 06:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-sexypancake.livejournal.com
Guuuuuuh....this fic....fingering is one of my favorite kinks!! Gahhh! You have left me feeling very....hot and bothered. PLEASE WRITE MORE!

Date: 2011-01-03 02:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Fingering is a favorite of mine too! I'm trolling through the 1sm right now, though I haven't seen many opportunities to do a fill with more fingering. Maybe we should fix that! :D

Date: 2011-01-01 07:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] titacats.livejournal.com
Oh. My. God.
I love you.
I have no words.


Date: 2011-01-03 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
I love you too! :D

Date: 2011-01-01 07:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heartsasmagnets.livejournal.com
Whoa. That was unexpectedly hot. Your descriptions of things are gorgeous. ♥

Date: 2011-01-03 02:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
♥ ♥ Your praise makes me all warm and gooey inside~

Date: 2011-01-01 08:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ficcy.livejournal.com
Well now I am dreadfully late for a movie, because I was too distracted by reading this. Twice. And that remedy? Good to know.

Date: 2011-01-03 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Oh no! I'm sorry that I made you late for your movie! Awful coordination of our schedules. We should get someone on that.

Date: 2011-01-01 09:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spite-pet.livejournal.com
Hiccups have never been sexier. Wow, this was hot! UNF!

Date: 2011-01-03 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
And the best part about is is that it's true. <3

Date: 2011-01-01 10:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fire-and-fall.livejournal.com
OH MY. *______*

Date: 2011-01-03 02:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com

Date: 2011-01-01 01:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] phycodemented.livejournal.com
click. save.

this is pretty much the only coherent words i have in my brain right now

Date: 2011-01-03 02:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
*flappy hands* Saved for reals? :D *butterfly kisses!*

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From: [identity profile] phycodemented.livejournal.com - Date: 2011-01-03 11:53 am (UTC) - Expand

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Date: 2011-01-01 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jedishadowolf.livejournal.com
Well! I think Blaine might've failed in the whole never think of hiccups again effort...if that's the cure why wouldn't Kurt want to get the hiccups again? :) Hot stuff right there!

Date: 2011-01-03 02:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Haha, well, the not thinking would be for a little while at least. And surely if Blaine got hiccups again later, he'd know exactly who to call?

Not the Ghostbusters.

Date: 2011-01-01 03:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pyroclastic.livejournal.com
*reread it for a third time* Woman, you will never cease to amaze me. It's just so sexy and gentle and sweet. I can't help but wonder what Blaine was thinking the entire time, Kurt in a position that he must have imagined a million times.


Kurt found Blaine’s foot with his toes and slid them alongside each other. It was a bold move, but it was hard to be shy when his cock was just lying out there in the open.

I don't know why I love this so much. Maybe because it's such a subtly intimate touch, seductive yet shy. Absolutely beautiful, bb.

Date: 2011-01-03 03:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rrrowr.livejournal.com
Oh, god. Woman, now you've got me thinking about doing a remix of my own fic but in Blaine's POV. I don't think anything would actually come to fruition from these thoughts, but it's an interesting thing to ponder.

I'm not even sure myself when it changes for Blaine. When it stops being an attempt to help with a slight ulterior motive and becomes just wanting to see Kurt fall apart because of him. I know he feels kind of ashamed that he's getting any kind of pleasure out of this. I know that he also wants Kurt too much to really care about his own shame, that he just wanted this moment -- just this once and especially when it could be his only chance. And once Kurt knows that Blaine's hard and once he's reassured Blaine that it's okay and when he's asking Blaine for just a little more, how could he say no?


But yeah, anyway.

Thank you, bb~ ♥ I hope you know that I love you long time.

Date: 2011-01-01 08:21 pm (UTC)

Date: 2011-01-03 03:12 am (UTC)
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